I Heart Mac

I drug my computer savvy friend, Lisa, outside the perimeter last weekend. We went to the mall. I know. It's disgusting. But we did it. But I had a noble reason. I'd say it was to buy Christmas presents for needy children, but that would be a blatant lie. And I'm not a liar. Besides, I haven't bought a Christmas present for anyone in about five years. I know. It's awesome. So anyway, Lisa was there to guide me in my purchase of a MacBook. I know. It's thrilling. As the packed parking lot indicated, the mall was busy with mindless shoppers, and the Apple store was no exception. Lisa and I stood in front of the MacBook display and waited to be noticed. It took about 10 seconds. I know. It's amazing. A nice, young, skinny guy approached us with nice, young, skinny woman in toe. I informed him I wanted to purchase a laptop. He started talking about features and some $250 warranty package. I let him talk, but not because he was cute in a quirky, disheveled way. I was staring at his discolored tooth. I know. It's unfortunate. After his little speech, I was like, "Uh-huh. I'm ready to buy it." So he leads us to the back of the store to check out. And so we did. It was the easiest $1,200 purchase I've ever made. Until I got home. Being computer retarded, I had no idea how to rig my computer to get online. I waited for Shelley the Great Domestic Goddess to get home, but she was a bit business with her own life. I know. It's inconvenient. But Shelley assured me she would try to hook up the wireless Internet over the Thanksgiving break. Meanwhile, there's a hunk of expensive equipment sitting unused in my room. I know. It sucks.