For Our Readers (continued)

*Disclaimer* You really should read the previous post to get the full effect of this one.

Let's recap. Frozen pizza. Rapid conversation. Shelley changing. Thanks for the warning this time, roomie.

...she froze in the hallway and screamed like a banshee. Usually, my initial reaction to a screaming woman is to scout for the Gremlin and haul ass in the opposite direction. But I didn't have time to react, because I'm pretty sure Shelley laid a death grip on me and thrust me in front of her. I could have imagined that, but I'm writing this friggin' half of the story. Frantically, Shelley points at the ceiling, and I follow her trembling finger to a moving black spot on a stark white strip of crown molding. It was a roach. Granted it was a big roach, but it was just a roach.

Apparently She-Ra has her weakness, and it was staring right at us. Now I must admit my admiration for the woman who bravely walked outside in her bare feet only days before to investigate strange noises faltered in that brief moment. But only for a moment. I was happy to be the "man" of the house if only for the time it took to capture Shelley's kryptonite. Or so I thought. I do get macho points for approaching the situation with gusto. I grabbed the empty California Kitchen pizza box and a Swiffer with cool confidence. I located my target. And then I turned to Shelley and said, "If this thing falls on me, I'm going to scream like a little bitch." I held the box above my head and jabbed the critter with the Swiffer. Of course it didn't fall in the box, which would have been convenient. Instead it fell on the floor and scurried around blindly. I, in turn, squealed and attempted to keep both of my feet in the air. I did all of this while valiantly trying to usher the roach into the box. Obviously it wasn't a fan of barbeque chicken. I, however, highly recommend it. Since the little bugger just wouldn't cooperate, I squished it with the Swiffer. Thus another exciting night ended in the household of Shannon & Shelley.